I am a whiner tonight!

I have found it amazing the things I have put my body thru to stay alive. Chemo just about wears me out, and causes the "chemo crazies", it makes me nauseated, and makes my gums so raw, they bleed. With the huge blood clot I have around my port, I give myself 2 shots in the stomach every morning, and 2 shots in the stomach every night. My stomach is so bruised. I start my chemo regimen again Monday, and believe me, I am not looking forward to it. Now, don't get me wrong. I am grateful for it's life saving effect, I just wish there was an easier way. I had a blood transfusion on Monday, and I have been waiting for the burst of energy I was hoping it would give me. But so far, that hasn't happened. I guess tonight, I am just a whiner. Maybe feeling sorry for myself, or just tired. Whatever this is, I just wish it would get better. There is always tomorrow, and for that, I am grateful. I am so grateful for a tomorrow. Not everyone has one. I am anxious to be done with the 2 regimens of chemo, then my PET scan to make sure all the cancer is gone. That scan will make sure the cancer didn't move anywhere else in my body. I am ready to see and hear it is all gone. I am so ready to have hair again. I am ready to not take shots, chemo, and have energy. And I am really ready to stop whining!