One more round of chemo

This coming Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday is my last chemo round. In some ways, I'm excited. Excited to not have that poison flowing into my body, but scared for it not to, because that poison killed my cancer. The last scan I had, the cancer was gone in my lungs and lymph nodes. That is the good news. After this last round of chemo, the Dr will do a PET scan and make sure it didn't move to some other location. I am choosing to believe it didn't move. That just makes me feel better. Here is the part that is hard...the type of cancer I have, according to the Drs will come back. The only question is when. I know this cancer journey has been the toughest walk I have ever had, bar none. So I already know I don't want to keep going down this road over and over again, and yet I know I will when the time comes. What I do know is that I'm tired. At times, to the point of weary. So maybe it's a good thing my chemo is coming to an end. Maybe this is just the time I need to lean a little harder on the Lord. He called all us weary people, and said He would give us rest. I believe that to be true. So I will lean on Him, press in, and just hold on. The truth is, I'm just scared. Scared this will never be over, and then scared it will end. Life is tough, no matter how long we may live. I have 10 grandchildren, with number 11 on the way. So I want my living to be a long time. Maybe I'm just scared of trying to live a normal life, whatever that is. What I'm not scared of is my relationship with the Lord. Honestly, that is the only thing I am sure of. Everything else is uncertain. So just keep praying for me. Pray for complete healing, pray for some peace for me, and pray for my drs, that they will continue to do the right things for me. So, I'm glad this is coming to an end.....not so much. Just keep on keeping on, becky