I have discovered I'm tired, and probably a little whiney. I am tired of a lot of things. I am mainly tired of being sick. I am tired of doctors, but grateful they have worked hard at keeping me alive. I am tired of so many of the responsibilities Cheryl and I should be sharing, she is doing most herself. Yet I am grateful she is there. I am tired to the toll this disease has taken on my body. I am tired of shots every morning and night(they sting), and I know my port will clog back up if I don't do it. I am grateful I have 1 more round of chemo (3 days), but dread the 10 brain radiations they are going to do to my brain after chemo. What is that going to do me? I am tired of such an uncertain future,but grateful for an awesome God. I know faith isn't knowing everything will be ok, it is being ok with whatever happens. And I am ok with whatever happens. I love the Lord. I love that he loves me. I am grateful for the people God has put in my life that have been such a tremendous help to me. I am so thankful He saw my face the day He hung between heaven and earth, and then died...for me. Since I seem to feel so tired and heavy laden, I know where to go. Sickness is a burden. A big burden on my physical, emotional, spiritual, and financial being. Sometimes I don't juggle them all well, and drop one that I'm juggling. Then I cry. And cry again. But now, I'm not crying. I am just tired and grateful, all at one time. Geez, sometimes I feel so conflicted. :). So for now, I will just keep the faith. I will keep putting one foot in front of the other. I will keep fighting the good fight, and pray for strengh. Keep praying, Becky