Tuesday, May 17, 2011

You would think I would be jumping for joy

You would think I would be jumping for joy. Don't get me wrong, I'm elated over the news from yesterday. But today, I am just tired. Really tired. I even had the blood transfusion yesterday, and I feel worn out. I am just ready to not be sick. I just want to feel good, not tired, sore, bald, chemo crazy, sick from chemo, no energy, out of breath, and I want my gut to quit hurting. I don't know how people do this for years. I have done it for months, and I'm already tired of it. But I am so grateful to God. I am grateful that he has removed my tumors, and given me a chance at a life. I am thankful for his healing touch, and his love for me. Especially when you consider I do not deserve anything. What an awesome God I serve, that He could love me in spite of myself, and the life I have lived. I certainly don't deserve it. I am just grateful for the miracle He has performed, and believe me, this is a miracle. I have 2 more rounds of chemo to go, and I will be glad when they are over. Then I have the PET scan, and I guess that is when I can officially jump for joy. But I'm happy now. I saw the scan from yesterday, and it was clear of all tumors. What a big blessing! So, today, I am just worn out and nauseated, and tired. Maybe after a good nights sleep, all will be well. I know all is well with my soul, now if I could just have everything well with my body. So, I will just keep on keeping on, and more importantly, keep the faith. Becky

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Becky:

Always remember,god works in mysterious ways, and I am so happy for you!!!
Love you very much....
Dale

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad you have the opportunity to live now and not worry about your expiration date. It's time to do all the things you thought you may not have time to do... Make plans, live life to the fullest! <3

Laura said...

Becky ...... Nothing can break your Spirit ....... Our Lord will carry you when he has to ..... Keep your chin up Becky.... Not a minute goes by that I don't think of you and wonder how you are feeling. Keep the faith !!